


Monthly Meetings

by Author_Chan06



Category: Batman - All Media Types
Genre: Developing Relationship, F/F, First Kiss, Healthy Relationships, Insane people acting Sane, M/M, Multi, Panic Attacks, Relationship Advice, Snacks & Snack Food, Talking
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-11
Updated: 2021-01-11
Packaged: 2021-03-14 07:42:38
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,758
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28667178
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Author_Chan06/pseuds/Author_Chan06
Summary: Some of the rogue gallery’s started meeting monthly to talk about mess ups, successes, and just to talk and hang out - per Harley’s request.They leave all hate outside the door, and pretend they’re just one weird family.
Relationships: Joker (DCU)/Bruce Wayne, Oswald Cobblepot/Edward Nygma, Pamela Isley/Harleen Quinzel
Comments: 4
Kudos: 44





	1. Inside This House, During This Day

Harley and Pamela got there first. They always do. Followed by Jonathan, then Oswald and Edward, next is Joker, then Bane, and lastly Harvey.

The order of the middle changes every month, but Harvey always comes last. He doesn’t want to come and was the hardest to convince.

Surprisingly Joker was the easiest, and Jonathan wasn’t hard either. Pamela came with just some of Harley’s puppy eyes, and Edward came when Oswald asked him too.

So now they meet every month on the 20th.

Harley had been the one to start it, saying it would help their health, and allow them to coordinate their attacks if they wanted to.

Pamela suspected its just cause the woman wanted to gossip with the others, specifically Oswald. The two had talked once, had actually gotten along great, and started a lovely friendship.

But aside from that - the girls had went off, searching for a house the Bat, and the police, wouldn’t look for them all at.

After they found the perfect house, they went shopping. Aka Joker took Harley to rob a store. Edward went along as well - as he didn’t believe they would pick furniture and decorations that looked good - and picked out everything.

They stuck with only a few things, and Joker fought the Bat while the others ran away with the stuff. Then Bane helped move the furniture inside.

The girlfriends sat on their normal spot in the right corner, from the front, of the square shaped couch, and turned on the tv, cuddling as they waited for the others.

After a few minutes the professor walked in, taking his usually spot too, sitting on the left closest to the tv.

Once Oswald walked in, the madwoman perked up, waving over at him with a smile, that he easily returned. He scurried over to the couch, plopping down next to Harley, as Edward walked in, playing with a personally designed Rubik's Cube, that was designed to be more difficult, and sat next on his new-boyfriends left.

Harley smiled when she saw it, turning to her friend. “I see he liked the gift?”

”Yes, you’re advice was lovely, Harley, I can’t think you enough. I asked him out, and gave that to him, and he was a glow with how excited he was.” He blushed.

”Ya know I’m always the one ya can come to for advice!” Jonathan chuckled, looking over at her, and lowering her a look. “Well not _always_...” She chuckled, embarrassed.

The door swung open again, and Joker walked in, making a beeline for the kitchen.

Harley waved. “Evenin’ Puddin’!” While everyone else tensed for a moment, before they all remembered where they where. They all settled back down, and turned to the tv.

”Hey Harls!” They could hear him rummaging around in the fridge, and letting out a triumph ‘Hah!’ “Anyone want some snacks? I made cinnamon cookies!” 

Jonathan nodded. “Yeah I want one.” The madman grabbed the tray and walked over to the couch. He threw one at the professor as he passed, sitting down in the left corner, and humming happily.

Turning around, and snatching one of them off the plate, Oswald sent a smile to him. “Good evening, Joker. Thanks for the cookies.”

He gave him finger guns after sitting the plate on him lap, and giggled. “Good evening to you too Ozzie.”

”Oz can ya get me a cookie too?” She asked, he nodded, grabbing another one and handing it to her. “Thanks!” Nibbling on the cookie, she turned back to Pamela. “Pam-Pam, do ya wanna cookie too?”

”Uh, sure Harls.” She offered her girlfriend a smile, and gave a thank you as she was handed a cookie.

As they all ate and watched, Bane walked it. He sat next to Jonathan and they both started talking about his newest chemical compound. It seemed he wasn’t getting the reaction he wanted.

”Well what reaction are you going for?” Harley piped up.

”It’s different from my fear gas. This is supposed to allow me to give my target a high phobia of whatever I want. Like suppose I wanted them to be scared of spiders and sprayed them with with the gas, well next time they see a spider they’ll pass out. But it seems they’re always just scared of me.”

”Hm.” Joker tapped his chin. “Wouldn’t you need to show them the item you want them to be scared off when you gas’em?” The professor blinked.

”I...yes...I suppose I would.”

The madman tilted his head at the weird response, before a look of realization crossed his features, and he laughed. “Wait, I just helped you didn’t I? You really couldn’t figure that out, and I did in like 30 seconds!” Jonathan puffed up his chest, face burning, as he looked him straight in the eyes.

At that exact moment, the last person walked in, doing a double take. “What’s going on?”

”I’m the new Professor!” Joker proudly announced before doubling over with laughter again. Harvey slowly walked forward, sitting on the right across from the blushing Jonathan.

”Harley, what’s he talking about?” She let out a hum, turning away from the two and looking over at the man.

”Oh! Just J helped Jonny with his newest fear gas stuff, apparently he just couldn’t figure it out, and J knew immediately.”

She pointed at the Joker. “Also, J made cookies! Want some?”

”Sure, what kind?” He accepted the cookie, taking a look back over at the two, why had started talking about different phobia’s he could make, before he took a bite.

”Cinnamon!”

He nodded, giving her a smile. “So what’s this show about, anyway?”

Pamela answered for her, shifting in her seat. “It’s about the zoo. It’s talks about how they care for the animals.”

”Ya know. Pammy, we should go to the zoo!” The woman paused. “Does Gotham have a zoo?”

”Yeah it does.” Joker called.

”Wait...How do you know that?” The two paused their conversation, as the jester grinned.

”Just used it for a plan a few weeks ago. But not to worry Harls! It’s still intact, I’m quite fond of animals, so they’re all fine!” Her eyes shined, head darting back to her girlfriend.

”Yay! We have ta go, and see the lions!”

Pamela smiled. “Sure, why not.”

”Yay!” She cheered, throwing her arms around the other. The woman blushed.

”Alright, Harls...You can let go now.” Harley shook her head.

”Nope.”

She squeezed harder, burying her face in her neck. The plant lover awkwardly wrapped her arms around her back - she was still getting used to her girlfriends touchy behavior.

”Oswald...” Said man blinked, looking over at Edward with a smile. “I was wondering...When did you have time to make this anyway?” He gestured towards the Rubik’s Cube.

”Oh, Eddie dear, I worked on it while you where at the riddle factory!” 

“...I have to say you did a good job.” A small smile flashed across his face, and he clicked another side of the cube over. “It will take a little while for me to finish this.”

Joker handed Edward a cookie. “Here ya go, Eddie, you haven’t had one yet! You can’t leave before you do, that would be a shame!”

”Harley, lions are on the tv!” Quickly pulling herself partly off her girl, she turned to watch. Pamela sent a grateful look at Bane, who just gave her a thumbs up.

Grabbing another cookie, the jesters eyes flickered between the two couples on the couch. He frowned. Oswald noticed, before turning around to face him.

”What’s wrong?” He gestured to the couples.

”You’ve all finally talked everything out and are together. And I STILL can’t get the Bat to say he even likes me! I know he does! I’m not an idiot, but well...let’s just say he must have spent a lot of time in Egypt...”

”I agree that he does, and if I say he does he does” Edward piped up, messing with the cube as he talked.

”Yeah Puddin’ you’ve both got it bad.”

Even Pamela nodded. “Yeah, Batman probably beats himself up over it. Or he might be so deep in denial he doesn't even know.”

”Have you even just...talked to him. No hostages, no bombs, no joking. Just...talk?”

”No! Why would I do that? My Bats deserves the best, and I’ll happily oblige!”

Oswald frowned. “Because he might think you’re joking, or trying to get under his skin.”

”He thinks...he thinks all those large declarations of love are jokes?! Why would I joke about that?!” He gasped, dramatically waving his hands as he talked.

”No offense Puddin’ but ya joke a lot, and your not exactly the easiest person to read...” He hummed, completely still, before he seemed to reboot. Looking up at Oswald, and pouting.

”I can’t believe this...I-...told him so many different things! I told him secrets, and where I got my clothes, I told him he was my other half, and that I would feel dead if he died, and you’re saying...he thought all that was a joke?”

”...Yes...”

“I don’t find my feelings funny.” Joker grumbled, sinking into the couch.

”But he thinks you do. So you need to show him he’s wrong. Talk to him.”

”An’ if he still denies it, just come get me and I’ll bonk him on the head with my bat!” Harley chirped.

”Thanks Harls...Alright! I’ll do it! I’ll try and talk to Batsy!”

”Make sure to tell us how it goes next time, alright?” He nodded.

”Of course!”

The clowns smiled at each other, before Harley checked her phone. Her smile wavered. “Well guys! It’s around 11:40 so...”

Edward looked up. “Who’s turn is it this time?” Pamela hummed.

”I think it’s Jokers?” He visibly brightened, throwing a smirk around the room.

”Alright, everyone! Throw down your money, and let’s do this!”

Harley sat down a hundred on the table in front of the couch. Pamela sat down another hundred. Edward sat down forty. Oswald laid down another hundred. Jonathan huffed, setting down a twenty. Bane put down fifty. Harvey laid down eighty.

Joker clapped his hands, excitedly. “Alrighty what are we doing to time around?”

”Lets do numbers! Alright Puddin’ I’m thinkin’ of a number in between 1-20 and if you guess the number or the two next to it you win!”

”Do I get clues?”

”Hm...What do you think Pam-Pam?” The plant lover hummed.

”Sure. Two clues.”

”Alright...When doubled it’s in the twenties, and it’s close to a multiple of 5!” 

“I’m gonna guess 14!” She giggled.

”It’s 13! But you still win, ya know! So grab ya money J.” Letting out a whoop, he scrambled forward, reaching out and gathering it into his arms. “Well ya knows it time to go now...This was nice, see ya all next month, right?”

Edward smiled, nodding. “Of course. Oswald and I will be there, for sure.” Oswald tentatively slid his hand into his boyfriends, with a smile of his own.

”Yes. Just as he said. And next time we have to talk about _that thing_ you said last time.” Harley nodded, giggling quietly.

”Sure Ozzie! See ya next time!” She gave them another wave as they walked out the door.

Next up was Harvey. He gave them all a smile, and quickly ducked out.

The madwoman rolled her eyes. “I can’t believe he still acts as if he hates this!”

”Just give him time, I think he’s embarrassed.” She pecked Pamela on the cheek, smiling brightly.

“Yeah, you’re right.”

“Bye Harley, Pamela. See you next month.” Bane nodded, walking away.

”Bye-Bye, Baney!” Her eyes flickered over to Joker still sitting on the couch.

He was staring at the tv, but she could tell he wasn’t actually looking at it. She frowned, gesturing for her girl to move for a minute. Once Pamela did, she shifted over to him, and snapped her fingers in front of his face.

Startling back to reality, his eyes focused on her. “Oh Harley-gal! I didn’t see you there.”

”J? Are ya nervous?” He blinked, before he seemed to come back to himself.

He scoffed, eyes wavering. “Of course not! I’m the Joker! What would I be nervous about?”

”About talkin’ to the Bat?” Her eyes softened, as she watched him nervously watch her, his hands curling into fists in the couch, face dusting with red.

”...What if he doesn’t believe me? He never has before? What if he thinks talking is to boring, and he leaves? Or what if I really did just misread everything, and me doesn’t actually even like me?” He let out a shaky breath, and as if he just realized what he said, he backpedaling. “I-I mean, Of course he likes me! I don’t ever doubt myself! No-no, I’m Joker. And it’s always been this way. The Clown and the Bat-“

”Puddin’! It’s fine to be nervous.” Harley blushed, “I know I was...But you are right. He does like you! I know it! You’ll be fine, he will believe you. So go tell him.” She grabbed both of them, Pam and J, and started walking towards the door.

”Thanks Harls...I needed that.” His eyes were downcast so he couldn’t see her, but she gave him a smile anyway.

”No problem! I’m still you therapist after all!” He chuckled, as they got to the door.

They paused, the girls farther inside an Joker about to walk outside.

”Oh and J...It doesn’t matter who ya are, you still doubt yourself but that’s fine, and ya just can’t let it get ya down.”

He nodded, picking his head up and looking her in the eyes. “Got it Doc.” 

With out last look back he started walking away. Sending a wave over his shoulder.

“See you next month, Harls!” They waved back, while Harley smiled at him.

”Of course, J! See ya then!” She watched him walk until he disappeared into the dark.

Then it was just Harley and Pamela. She couldn’t wait for next month. After all, she knew Joker could be a great story teller, and as surprising as it was, she would miss her weird little family.

One day they would thank her for this, but until then she’ll just delight in their company, and help them when they need it.

After all, the crazy’s all need to stick together, right?


	2. Atop This Roof, During This Night

Joker paced nervously across the roof, ringing his hands together. His expensive shoes clicked on the stones, as he moved. His hair was freshly washed and brushed. His suit new and without even a single wrinkle. It was purple of course, as where the matching pants, and his gloves were a shiny leather.

He knew it probably wasn’t needed, but he had hoped it would make him more confident, and he wasn’t lying when he told them his Bat deserves the best.

He wasn’t sure if it was working. Sure he’d told Batman a million times he loved him. But if Oswald was right, he didn’t believe him. He thought he was joking, trying to mess with him - which honestly he thought was a ridiculous thing to joke about - so this would be like the first time he was telling him.

Not only that but, it would be the first time they talked and met up like this. He wasn’t even one hundred percent sure the Bat would show up. He had no hostages, he hadn’t stolen anything, and even though his instincts screamed at him to at least plant a backup bomb, he resisted. So if Batman wanted to leave, there wasn’t anything he could do to stop him.

All he’d done is leave a note in front of his mansion. Joker was betting on the fact he would come just cause he thought he didn’t know he was Bruce.

He froze, letting out a growl. This was ridiculous! He was the Joker! This should be easy. It was just a few words, without violence. Without backup. Without weapons...

_Vulnerable._

On second thought maybe this was a bad idea? He was Joker, Joker isn’t vulnerable! This wasn’t their dance. This wasn’t how they did things! There was _no way_ this would work! The Bat would think he’s going soft, and they would never meet again. He’d lock him in Arkham and leave the little birds to fight him, he’d stop responding to his threats, he’d think of him as _weak and boring_ -!

_No-! He needed to leave now!_

But before he could get anywhere a thump from behind caused him to tense. The Bat. It had to be. His lungs felt frozen, eyes glossy.

_Hecouldnthecouldnthecouldnt!_

He couldn’t move. Eyes staring at the ground, limbs locked in place. He could hear the Bat clearly in the almost silent night. 

_Step. Step. Step. Deep breath. Pause._

Even though he knew he was right next to him, feeling the hand grab his shoulder seemed sudden. Like he’d came out of no where, and his heart picked up speed for more reasons than one.

He needed to calm down. _Calm down. Calm down._ He could do this. It would be fine. He took a deep breath, turning around to look at Batman.

And his breath was lost to him again. He was here. Ever time it seemed impossible, but why? It shouldn’t be. He should really be used to it by now. But somehow he knew he never really would.

He was waiting for him to say something, do anything, and Joker could tell. He opened his mouth to talk, to declare his love, promise to never mess with Batman’s other alter ego, to tell him he understood him, that he accepted him, but nothing came out. He was crumbling under his glare. _Why was he glaring?_

He hadn’t done anything tonight, he had purposely been a good boy...

_So why-...why was he glaring?_

His breathing picked up, as his eyes darted around the Bats face. Looking for - something other anger. What had he done? Maybe he had been wrong? What if he’d just been projecting onto the vigilante?

”...Joker?” His voice sounded soft, confused. The clown blinked, looking up at him, as he panicked.

”B-Batman - _haha_ \- h-hello!” He cursed at himself, giving his beloved a smile. “How are you?”

”I’m...good?” Joker nodded, letting out a breath, and stepping back. “How do you know? Where did you find out?”

Looking at him, the clown frowned, tilting his head to the side.

”My identity.” Realization crashed into him, and he gasped.

”Oh! That...I just stopped denying it really...” The Bat froze, narrowing his eyes. He probably didn’t believe him. _It’s honestly hard to believe everyone doesn’t know._ “You’re, ah, not as good as you think you are at keeping secrets. But don’t worry!” He smiled. “I won’t tell anyone!”

”How can I trust you?”

The jesters eyes softened. “Have I ever lied to you?”

There was a pause, while he looked back into his memories to answer. “...No...”

The Joker cleared his throat, dusting off his suit, as he gathered his courage. “I spoke with some friends-“

”Spoke? Or interrogated?”

”I did say spoke didn’t I?” Joker sighed. “I really did talk to them. No violence. Not an interrogation.”

”I wasn’t aware you had friends.” Batman walked next to the Joker. The madman sat down, dangling his feet off the roof. He patted the side next to him.

”Once a month I do.” The Bat side eyed him, before sitting down as well.

”What do you want from me Joker?” The clown felt his face beat up, and he ducked him head.

”Well that’s a long list...” He chuckled awkwardly. “Anyway! These friends said you’ve been - haha - taking what I said as a joke...” Inching his hand over, he hesitatingly sat it on top of the Bat’s.

”What...are you talking about?” The vigilante didn’t move, leaving his hand, and - _maybe his eyes were play tricks on him but_ \- inched a little closer.

”Bats? Ya do know I love you right? None of that was a lie, or a-...a joke. You are my world...”

_Silence._

”Batsy? Say something. You don’t feel the same do you? - Haha! - I knew this was a bad idea! I should have never let them talk me into this!” His breath picked up again, eyes watering, as tears pricked at his eyes. “Of course, of course- you don’t! Your Batman! This was a bad idea - _badideabadideabadideabadidea!”  
_

A hand landed on his shoulder, another squeezed his hand but he was already spiraling.

”Oh god! What was I thinking?! I shouldn’t have - I shouldn’t have - this isn’t how we work! This would never work and I knew it!”

”Joker...”

”How could I have possibly thought he would like me back? No- _nonononono_ NO!” He couldn’t see, could hardly feel anything. What was happening?!

”Calm down.”

He gasped, reaching out for the voice. “Where-? What-? Why can’t I see?! - _Hahahahaha_ \- Batsy?! Help!”

Suddenly he was being pulled, something wrapping around him. Heavy. Restraining. He struggled against it for a moment until it was clear he wouldn’t be getting away. Warm. His eyes drooped, as he wrapped his arm around the object.

”It’s alright Joker...I believe you...”

His breath hitched. “You do?” Burying his face in his neck, he shuddered.

”I do and...” The vigilante cleared his throat. “I-...feel the same.”

Joker immediately pulled away, and stared wide eyed at the vigilante. “You do? You’re not lying are you?”

”Have I even lied to you?”

Joker giggled. “No. You haven’t.”

Batman slowly pulled his arms away, and grabbed at the cowl. “You-you don’t have to.”

”It’s fine. I don’t mind, and I think it will make it easier.”

”Make what easier-?” Bruce smiled, grabbing his neck and pulling Joker forward. He met him in the middle, melding together, lips moving together.

The jester tentatively swiped at his lip and he eagerly replied. Hands resting on Jokers waist, and the clowns wrapped around his neck, they pulled back, panting softly.

”I- might owe Ozzie dear a thank you...”

”What does Penguin have to do with this?”

“Well let’s just say, I might have been _a bit_ clueless.”

”I could tell.”

They both chuckled, turning back to the city, the Joker snuggling into Bruce’s side. They watched as the sun started to rise.

Lighting up their world, their city, and each other. Joker smiled, eyes gazing up at _His Bat._

Huh.

He liked the sound of that.

_Maybe this really could work?_


End file.
